A small, happy little dog learned of this place and decided to visit. When he arrived, he bounced happily up the stairs to the doorway of the house. He looked through the doorway with his ears lifted high and his tail wagging as fast as it could. To his great surprise, he found himself staring at 1000 other happy little dogs with their tails wagging just as fast as his. He smiled a great smile, and was answered with 1000 great smiles just as warm and friendly. As he left the House, he thought to himself, “This is a wonderful place. I will come back and visit it often.”

In this same village, another little dog, who was not quite as happy as the first one, decided to visit the house. He slowly climbed the stairs and hung his head low as he looked into the door. When he saw the 1000 unfriendly looking dogs staring back at him, he growled at them and was horrified to see 1000 little dogs growling back at him. As he left, he thought to himself, “That is a horrible place, and I will never go back there again.”

All the faces in the world are mirrors. What kind of reflections do you see in the faces of the people you meet?

Japanese Folktale (Author unknown)

For quite some time, I’ve been looking forward to this day. Many people told me that it’s not as special, but adding +1 to my years lived means much more than just increasing the count.

I always enjoyed being independent and going my own ways—doing what I think is right. Other perspectives are important, but eventually deciding on my own is what makes me feel free. And these decisions go far beyond being able to pick every drink from the menu now.

“18 is one of the best ages. You get to do adult things while still acting like a kid.”

Call me naive, but curiosity and knowing so little about life helps me move forward and explore the unknown. It’s scary—which is the most intriguing part of it all. I might stumble and hit rock-bottom, but that’s also how I learn to get up and try again.

I want to build things, do purposeful work, spend time with friends and family, get lost in music, and wander through nature—whatever makes this earth a better place and creates a peaceful life. It’s not about trophies, or any form of admiration.

“By doing the right things without expecting anything in return, the universe will reward you in the most beautiful ways.”

I am of firm conviction that we’re all born completely and fully ourselves as we can be. With the course of our lifetime, while being judged by others, trying to fulfill someone’s expectations, and morphing into what we think our part in society is, we get lost.

We lose our innocence, the undoubted trust we had in ourselves when we were a kid. We start to question whether we are enough or worthy of love. This part is to remind myself that I’m proud of me and how far I’ve come.

Lastly, here’s to all the great people in my life. You’ve helped me overcome many struggles, spoiled me with (tough) love, and showed me why I wake up every day, trying to be the best person I can be.

Some will leave, some will come. I learned that holding on sometimes hurts more than letting go, and you should rather embrace time spent together than worry that it might not stay the same forever.

It’s been an incredible year and I am thankful for every experience. As of now, I want to focus on myself and reappraise what has happened, as well as looking forward and building independence for the days to come.

Only to support my biggest and perhaps most ambitious aim: to be a positive influence in some people’s lives. Not for them to notice, but for them to feel—because there’s a difference.

Thanks for being with me.

Love, Linus

As we tend to believe in the best in every person, especially those we feel something for, it might be hard to accept that some people take more than we can offer in the long term.

I like to see “love” mainly as a verb. The constant commitment to another individual and their needs, nurturing both lives equally to protect solitude, sanity, and provide a space for growth.

Given the understanding of what a healthy love is, the best indicator to detect betrayl is your gut’s feeling. If it feels right, go with it—if something seems off, it probably is.

If I’m being honest, love has ruined most of this year for me, while also making small bits of it unexpectedly amazing. Rejection means redirection and I feel like that’s the path I’m currently on. A little lost, feeling left alone, but somehow trusting the process and trying to make the most of it.

I am utterly thankful for everyone who still gave me hugs, listened to my nonsense, forgave me. Everyone who stayed while having every reason to leave. Being aware of things with such a cluttered mind is quite hard sometimes and some days simply leaving the warmth of my bed was an enormous effort.

I figure sharing this is a way of telling myself that I am proud of myself and that everyone else who is struggling can be proud of themselves too.

Everyday we’re doing our best, however that may look like, because it’s different every day.

Another thing, not making it all particularly easier, is the numbness of my feelings that I’ve experienced for quite some time now. Equally happy and sad emotions are nothing more than distantly present. Just like everything is fundamentally irrelevant and I just don’t care.

My therapist mentioned that feelings give life its meaning and that resonated a lot. It explains why I recently miss a lot of motivation for work (so I am lucky to have amazing teammates who make everything a bit more bearable) or school (with all my awesome friends) who lighten up my days a little. This state has become default which can turn quite dangerous. I hope it’ll pass, without knowing how to handle it.

I’ve been told to be more myself again, but I kinda lost that self on the way. It’s almost like factory-resetting a phone: everything is gone, much applicationable knowledge is missing. I don’t know who I am, what my strengths are, how to be there for myself and others, or how love works (in case I ever really knew).

All that’s left is an aching heart and a mind that is empty and overflowing at the same time, so I am happy to be able to write all of this down right now.

And this is certainly not begging for attention (even though I can’t say I don’t enjoy it) but rather to tell that it’s okay to be sad and heartbroken and most importantly: that this is all a part of life; “a heart that is broken is a heart that’s been loved” and healing is not a linear process.

“BRISBANE GROTESK is a low-contrast, elegant but somehow brutal font. Some characteristics of the font come from Swiss Design and Brutalism. The word “Brisbane” comes from the two ancient words “brise” meaning a break, and “ban” - a bone, “break bone”. Brisbane was a name first mentioned in the 13th century, either referring to a doctor who healed bones or it was a nickname of someone who broke bones.

This ambiguous background is found in every fiber of the font. Exactly this contradiction between destroyer and healer can be found in every glyph. Uniform, transitional forms, alternate with breaks and inktraps.”

Kudos to Valentin for the incredible work on this typeface. The overall brutalist yet very accessible character resonated most, especially since my field of taste in fonts is very narrow.

The problem: Hennes & Mauritz GesmbH is the second largest fast-fashion brand in the world—along with brands like ZARA, C&A, COS, Uniqlo, or PULL&BEAR. Supporting this machinery seemed quite unethical after discovering some facts:

Dying and underpaid employees who are working 14-16 hours 7 days a week, child labour of around 500.000 underaged. An industry that is the second largest pollutor of clean water and extendedly craves coal power in developing countries.

Lastly, all of these brands encourage exessive overconsumption with items being trashed within 35 days (on average) after they were bought. Sales, coupons, Black Friday—all of these are tools with one specific purpose: making customers buy more.

After finding out about all of these facts I was disappointed and eventually saw the need for a change in my shopping behaviour. For the good of the people crafting the clothes and for the environment and our planet.

During our trip to Paris, my friend Jay and I had a conversation about fast fashion which eventually led to my shift of mindset. He told me about the history of fashion, why there are many more sustainable men's clothing brands and why fashion is or was considered more of a female attribute.

An insightful talk after which I gave myself the promise to not buy anything until I truly need it.

A new experience which needed a lot of discipline in the beginning. For now, I am going to through my whole wardrobe to sort out pieces I am not wearing anymore to , donate them, or gift them to friends who can make use of them for some more time.

I will focus on buying essentials that fit together in almost every combination. This will reduce the number of decisions I have to make, but also lay more weight on the quality and longlivability of my garments.

Current ideal outcome

• 4 black trousers, 2 beige trousers, 1 blue jeans
• 1 non-leather belt
• 6 black sweatshirts, 3 grey sweatshirts, 2 beige sweatshirts
• 5 black t-shirts, 5 beige/white t-shirts
• 1 white shirt, 2 overshirts
• 2 sneakers, 1 winter boots
• 3 black jackets, 2 beanies
• underwear, sportswear and accessories (watch, rings, etc.)

There is still much work required, but sorting out clothes that don’t serve me anymore and replacing them with more sustainable and long-lasting pieces is much more fun than I thought. I am following the 1-in-10-out rule here.

Before I conclude this article, I’d like to mention a few sustainable and human-friendly places to shop at. This is a collection of brands that I trust and confidently support in the way they do business and manufacture their products: View Garment Brands.

If you have any other brands or resources that you’d like to share, feel free to text me on Twitter, where I will also share my progress on reducing my trousseau. I am excited to hear about your wardrobe.

What about the rest? What about that shy little kid who loved to lay in the grass and look up at the clouds for hours counting? Or the one writing poems in the back of their notebooks. The one taking photos nonstop until there was not one stone left to capture.

We compromise so much of us, eliminating the whole of what we actually are. A person. A human. A soul wrapped in skin. Innocent children who simply want to play.

Why do I root my worth more in the opinion of an online-stranger than in affirmations of my closest friends? I am so scared to talk to someone about how I sincerely feel. It’s almost like I’ve forgotten how to. And yet, I yearn to feel nervous about it. To touch into all emotions right before I pour out my heart.

Genuine human connection. We all crave it. But we don’t know how to form it. Vulnerability, rawness, tears, hugs, poems, art, letters—that’s what I want more of. Need more of. To see each other as whole, as an individual life intertwined with ours if we choose to care enough.

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good.

It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit.

Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work.

Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile.

It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.”

I struggled with this for years, indeed. It was a time when I was fascinated with hand-lettering. Drawing letters, instead of simply writing them.

On the lookout for inspiration, I became more and more frustrated. Why is everyone else so much better? What can’t I do what they do? It took its sweet time for me to get past this urge to compare and wanting to do what they do. Eventually, I found my own style I was content with.

Looking back, I believe this gap is actually a very helpful asset. It helps asses whether the work you created lives up to your standards, to where you want it to be. If it does not—well, time to get your fingers dirty once more.

Whenever I needed someone to talk to, there were people to reach out to and they welcomed every emotion, every tear, or laugh. And this is something we need to tell each other way more often, and then act on it. Just listening to each other can change lives and save someone from drowning in their worries. Without judgement, simply reaching out a hand.

Tomorrow is the last day of this year. It was definitely a challenging one for me, especially mentally and emotionally. Of course, I was able to experience incredible things, was surrounded by pure people and got to see wonderful places. And yes, I am grateful for everything, even the bad moments of grief, sadness, loneliness, and hopelessness.

But they, just as much, withheld me from being fully present and treating the positive moments how they deserve to be treated. Realizing this really threw me off sometimes. And I wish I had faced my grief and every ounce of pain right when they emerged, but I didn’t, so they bounced back with 10x their power. I still have days where I don’t know where to go or if I wanna be here any longer.

But I know much better. Life is beautiful, even the deepest pain is. Because without the bad, there’s no good. I am trying to see this year in the most positive way, holding all lessons dearly close, so that 2023 can become a year of more smiles, hugs, telling people I love them and actually meaning it. Bonding stronger, being awkwardly weird and myself.

Making people feel loved. That’s what I wanna do. Not at my own expense, but so much that whoever is important to me knows it without second thought.

Rarely do we make an effort nowadays to truly get to know a person. We are on the lookout for redflags and, once we reach our threshold, we move on to the next person—without understanding why a person has certain characteristics, where their anxieties come from. What lies buried deep inside under old debris hardly sees the light of day because few do the work to dig for it.

To be fair: it’s scary. Opening up is so frightening that locking emotional baggage away is the easier solution. At least temporarily. But forming true connection requires us to let down our guards and invite people to the depths of ourselves.

“So, for now,
That is my description of Love.

Your heart finds it.
Your mind grows it.
Your actions keep it.”

Blank

People used to live without phones, without instant messaging, and still led a purposeful and rewarding life. It is, to an extent, imaginable that their lives were actually much more fruitful than a lot of the current ones appear to be.

“Simply put, humans are not wired to be constantly wired.”

Cal Newport, Digital Minimalism

Given a larger availability of disconnectedness, writing and receiving letters was the only reasonable form of (long-distance) communication. The first occurrence of this type of communication is tracked back to 500 BC, which is an incredible span.

In the past, their main purpose was to “send information, news and greetings. For some, letters were a way to practice critical reading, self-expressive writing, polemical writing and also exchange ideas with like-minded others” (wikipedia.org), which I find intriguing and inspiring on the one hand, and saddening to hear within our times on the other.

A letter’s greatest benefit is the concept of asynchronous communication. Nobody expects the other person to respond within a few hours, even days. Partly because it’s impossible to realize logistically, but moreover because the approach of mindfully drafting a letter and taking time to formulate properly is what made it so approachable.

As with everything, quality stands above quantity. And finding a letter in my mailbox still fills me with great joy every time. Eventually, the other person’s handwriting adds another layer of personality.

It's a lovely way of letting someone know you thought of them and how much you care for them.

How do you know
If it was worth it in the end?
Did every second really count
Or were there some you shouldn't spend
On anything but anyone you love?
Was this the life that you were dreaming of?
A movie night, a yellow light
You're slowing down and days are adding up

So don't waste the time you have waiting for time to pass
It's only a lifetime
That's only a while
It's not worth the anger you felt as a child
Don't waste the time you have waiting for time to pass
It's only a lifetime
That's not long enough
You're not gonna like it without any love
So don't waste it

I'm unimpressed
By the people preaching pain
For the sake of some small gain
In the sake of someone's name

I'm unprepared
For my loved ones to be gone
Call 'em way too often now
Worry way too much about mom
Don't waste the time you have waiting for time to pass

It's only a lifetime
That's only a while
It's not worth the anger you felt as a child
Don't waste the time you have waiting for time to pass
It's only a lifetime
That's not long enough
You're not gonna like it without any love
So don't waste it

It's family and friends, and that's the truth
The fountain doesn't give you back your youth
It's staying up too late at night and laughing under kitchen lights
So hard you start to cry

Don't waste the time you have waiting for time to pass
It's only a lifetime
That's not long enough
You're not gonna like it without any love
So don't waste it

“The more tech evolves, the more I crave the outdoors and finding simple pleasures like climbing a damn rock. I can admire the work and progress on one hand, and happily sidestep it on the other.”

Carl Barenbrug on Twitter

Most importantly just existing there, feeling the breeze wavering over your skin and having a sense of being and belonging. Creating external peace to allow yourself to find inner peace, too. Letting the mind wander, allowing thoughts to come and go. Perhaps randomly breaking out into tears because we are no longer distracted from our innermost feelings.

And at the same time – after remembering there is somebody else with you – also exchanging thoughts with them, sharing how you feel and letting them see your authentic self. Spinning ideas further, trying desperately to make sense of this life and its hidden meaning – only to snap back into reality, noticing the other person and how grateful you are for sharing such vulnerable and intimate moment with them.

After meeting Benjamin in 2019, I started to list a few people I’d like to get to know. Those were mostly designers based in Germany from whom I hoped to get input on my path after graduation (spoiler: I decided to not study anything).

“Life is beautiful not because of the things we see or do. Life is beautiful because of the people we meet.”

Simon Sinek

I have now met plenty of great people in person who I formerly found online, even from other countries. With many I nurture occasional contact, but some have become very close friends.

The web is an extremely powerful tool to build connections—but it is of unmeasurable value when these connections turn into fruitful friendships to guide you and inspire growth; To allow you to spend life with people who give you perspective, emotional support, memories, a feeling of belonging, and—most importantly—love.

I am thankful for everyone I’ve met so far, and look forward to joining more adventures. If, for any reason, you want to meet, I'm happy to arrange something.

Though I am deeply grateful for my supportive peers, it is equally saddening to see how people suffer from the narrow-mindedness of so many others. All the looks, the bullies, and irrespectable comments I have experienced have made me stronger—yet leave marks that will accompany me forever.

Having to look around you before kissing your partner in public or holding hands in fear of confrontation are the most basic habits of queer people. Everything to protect each other while compromising on the perhaps biggest deed of human kind: love.

I am proud to be queer, but I wish for a world where it doesn’t matter that I am.

I wrote an article about coming out. It’s in German, but I think technology is advanced enough to translate it. Read it here.

As Anton rightly says, life is unpredictable. Consequently, the biggest task in one’s life is balancing spontaneity and a sensible prospective.

“By embracing the journey and striving towards our own personal ideals of perfection, we can find a sense of purpose and fulfillment in our lives, even in the midst of the chaos and uncertainty of the universe.”

Anton Stallbörger

A recent client project forced me to build an RSS feed, and to debug, I decided on Feedbin. I had tested the platform before, but refused to pay after the end of the trial (before putting my digital well-being above monetary resources).

For the time being, I am very content with both the collection of sources, as well as how they’re being fetched and displayed. However, I quickly noticed how many sites lack a (properly formatted) RSS feed.

Either information is incomplete at most, or there is no feed in the first place. This is to say, to anyone (in)frequently publishing online: create an RSS feed and optimise it—everyone (me) will be forever thankful.

“People are so surprised when you are kind to them, when you take time out of your life to help them out. Because the expectation is that everyone’s busy and no one has time to help anyone.

But I guess that’s a product of the time we live in. We’re all so hyper-focused on ourselves that we forget we’re sharing the world with others.”

Manuel Moreale

In most cases, it hasn't been an issue to step back and give things some thought. Hitting the brakes on a crossroad until having a proper overview of the situation, however, does not work. Hence, it can become a hindrance in situations where quick reactions are necessary.

In any way, reading this article gave me a sense of comfort, and made me feel understood. It's always great to know you're not alone.

“How slowly or quickly you think is not an accurate measurement of your intelligence. Slow thinking is more deliberate and less emotional.”

Derek Sivers / Carl Barenbrug

“You can’t step into the same stream twice because it’s always flowing. Everything is.”

The Creative Act: A Way of Being, Rick Rubin

“Still, I believe that when chasing success for the long term, well-designed products should be able to rely on A-grade fundamentals. Would you build a cathedral on quicksand?”

Casper Lourens

My e-mail client of choice is Tempo. Before sunsetting, there was even a mobile app that I still miss dearly.

Casper—one of their designers—shared some insights about the process. On his note about Tempo’s icon set “Quill”, he wrote this paragraph I highly agree with. If the base of a product is well-formed, it will benefit everyone working on it at any point.